"Why I Use or Overuse the Word “love”?"

If you follow me on Twitter, you know that I preface many of my tweets with “love”. "I love...", "We love...", "Love..."As a writer, I understand that it’s an overuse of the word which lessens its meaning. However, I disagree with that rule. Why? Why would I disagree with the thinking of great minds? 

Well, first, I like to question and disagree with theories and ideas that don’t completely make sense to me. Not because I want to cause conflict or for the sake of disagreeing. I do this because questioning the greats allows me to further understand my world.

If I agreed with every rule of writing, I wouldn’t be writing for me. I would be writing to remain in the same bubble as all writers. As a lover of the written word (see, how quickly I use the word-ha!), I enjoy reading different voices and styles. If I kept to all the rules of writing, I wouldn’t be writing in my style. I agree that there are many rules that all writers should follow. 

Again, as previously mentioned in my first post, theory is the foundation, but we all have different ways of enjoying the ice cream cone. How boring life would be if we all had to eat the same flavor of ice cream. As much as I love (there I go, again) Ben and Jerry’s "Chunky Monkey", yesterday, I chose "Chocolate Fudge Brownie" because I needed a small break from my oh-so-lovely-banana-fudge-and-walnut-creamy-delight that makes me giggle and dance. By small, I mean yesterday’s market trip. As soon as the "Chocolate Fudge Brownie" container is empty, my shopping cart will be adorned with a lovely pint of… what else?!... Chuuunnnky Mon-key! I love that flavor and name!

Additionally, I use or “overuse” love, often, because when I love something or someone, I feel great passion for the person, thought, idea, object, etc., so why would I use a different word? Sure, I could use a synonym like: like, enjoy, penchant for, relish, passion, fondness, endearment, zest for, appetite for, soft spot for, etc., etc. You probably know more, too, and the list can go on and on and on. However, "love" conveys the strength of all those synonyms. Like John Lennon and The Beatles’ famously wrote and sang:

All you need is love

All you need is love

All you need is love, love

Love is all we need

Love, love, love

Love, love, love

Love, love, love

However, some of my favorite authors and great minds of the written word agree that oftentimes the simplest word has the most meaning. As a user or over user of a strong and powerful word, I couldn’t agree more as it relates to the word “love” when addressing family and friends. Of course, I use all the other synonyms. In fact, in my writings, I looove to use them. Ha! I make myself laugh. However, when speaking to a friend or family member, I use love a lot because I want to convey the message that I have a passion for life. 

By “loving” many people and things, I enjoy our world with greater zest and color. If I simply liked many things and only expressed "love" for a few in order to keep to the written rule of not overusing words, I wouldn’t be able to convey to my Twitter friends my passion for many people, places, activities, objects, etc.

Lastly and most important to me, I absolutely love many people, things, objects, experiences, etc. because the more I love about our world, the more I learn and grow. The more I grow, the happier I make myself and others I interact with in my personal life. Along with enriching my family and friends’ lives with my positive and loving energy, I indirectly have an impact, verbally and non-verbally, on the lives of others I encounter on the journey of life.

Feel free to disagree with me because we’re all entitled to enjoy or own flavor of ice cream while sitting side by side. 

"What's That Smell?!" Part 2

 "What’s That Smell?!” Part 2

After my husband and I checked the bottom of our shoes to make sure we hadn’t stepped on “something”, my husband turns back ready to ask our son to check his shoes. However, the expression on our son’s face along with his right sandal’s sole spoke volumes. Our son had stepped on dog poop… Thank you oh-so-kind-neighbor-up-the-street who loves to irk the neighborhood by letting his dogs use our front yards as their personal potty.

Sorry, I digressed, back to the meat of my story. Naturally, our son placed his feet on the car mat and… it smeared on the floor mat!!! Ugggh. Remember, we were on the freeway on our way to Camarillo, and, running late-very late at that point! What to do? What to do? The knowledge that there was dog feces on my car mat made me want to toss all contaminated objects out of my car. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh! Simply recalling that incident makes me feel like I need to shower. Ugh.

Quote from son: "Isn't it against the law to not pick up after your dog?"

But, I don't litter, so, I didn't.  Instead, we immediately exited the freeway to take care of our unexpected surprise. We stopped at the nearest gas station, but, just like an I Love Lucy episode, we had no luck with the water hose. The clock was tick-tocking away and we were trying to take care of business when a man in a vehicle approached us and asked if we were interested in buying wine?! I won’t go into details on the extent of our conversation (would require another post), but, as I type, I am laughing. Did he not see what we were dealing with or did he just not care?! It would be like someone coming in to ask Lucy and Ethel for a cup of sugar while they were dealing with their bread situation.

The issue with the hose, along with the man with no sense of empathy, had made our delay much longer than we could handle at that moment. Our son’s game was starting at 9 a.m., but, he needed to be at the baseball complex by 8 a.m. for warm-ups, etc., so, my husband asked if I happened to have anything in my car that would contain both our son’s sandal and the car mat until we reached the baseball complex. I did! “Seeeee, it pays to be ultra-prepared” I said with a laugh as I handed him a large heavy duty bag from my “just in case” emergency supplies. I like to tease him-he’s fun and it keeps our marriage interesting!

He placed all the soiled and stinky items into the bag, tied it and asked if I had an extra hair tie for added reinforcement. Of course, I did! A long-tressed runner and no hair ties on hand is unheard of, right, runners?! I was a bit grossed out at the idea of driving another 45 plus miles with that lovely package in tow, but, the only other option was to toss everything in the trash. We were tired, not thinking clearly, so, we went with the soiled items in bag option. After tossing our “gem” in the trunk, we prepared for take- off…

Meanwhile… inside my car…

While rubbing my husband’s shoulder with an awkward smile and tone that made me sound like Alexander, the character from Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day book-to-movie adaptation, I say, “Awwww, haaaappy father’s day, honey…”

Sccrrreeech…

Finally. We arrived at the ball-park. My son and husband quickly unpacked all the baseball gear and I was off to, yet, another early morning adventure-the  do-it-yourself car wash we spotted on our way to the baseball complex. The perfect place to power wash my floor mat and son’s sandal. Hence, that was my destination after the quick drop-ff. How hard could that be, right?! Well, apparently, quite the feat for ME!

Giving a full description of my experience at the –do-it-yourself car-wash would entail writing a “Part 3”, but, I don’t want to turn my blog into mini-books, so, I’m going to be very brief.

I felt like Lucille Ball throughout the experience. The pay machine was out of order, on and off, but, I stayed with it because, apparently, Sunday mornings, father’s day morning is where most of the men in Camarillo like to hang-out. Every stall of the multi-stall car cash was filled with cars and some had a waiting line. Just my luck, right?!

Summary of my car wash experience:

• ·        The soap/water hose was a little on the koo-koo side and sprayed everything, but, my car. Fortunately, I was able to power wash the mats and sandals before the fun began. I was soaked with car wash soap and water. The upside of a very warm California day was that I was wearing shorts. Believe me, my water fun didn’t go unnoticed. I had a few looks of what the heck is this woman doing? Doesn’t she know how to wash a car? Weirdo!

• ·        The “car-dryer” was more like a giant straw that seemed to be blowing air as if a person was blowing air through a regular sized straw. The $3 car-wash cost more like $15 and my car still looked like it had sat through rain drops.

• ·        Thankfully, I had my son’s Sky Zone socks which worked like a nice alternative to a towel. I knew those would come in handy one day.

My son’s game was starting in 5 minutes and it was too early; otherwise, I would have made a stop at my favorite burger eatery across the way.

I made it just in time to watch my son’s first at-bat. As I took this picture, my mom friend tapped my shoulder to tell me she had arrived late, too. She loves to laugh with me and we both had a story for each other… Ha! I love to laugh with family and friends.

What's That Smell?!

It was abouuut 7…? Sometime after 6:30 a.m., for sure, but I can’t recall the exact time. The feeling of running late was in the air. We had packed my car (a.k.a the family "truck") for the long drive to Camarillo from the Los Angeles County area. We no longer own a sport utility vehicle, so, my car is used for all the messy trips. We, definitely, can't treat our other car like a “truck”, so, I’m glad we were headed to a baseball tournament and drove my car… Boy, was I ever relieved to have been in my car when we received our unexpected surprise within minutes of departing towards Ventura County…

My husband and I look at each other at the exact same moment, with the same awkward, deep inhaled expression as if asking each other without speaking the words, whaaat is that? We look at each other a second, a third, a fourth time and finally, with a nauseous expression, scrunched up nose and raised right brow, I ask “Do you smell skunk?!” “Yyyyea, that’s it. Thhhhaaat’s what I’m smelling, too!”, he replies with a very similar expression while looking around the car to see where the smell is coming from.

We all look outside, open our windows, take a deep breath in unison as if we had rehearsed it, looked at each other, turned back to look at our son, who had the same expression on his face, only much more enhanced than ours. After a few seconds of this, we smell and see that the coast is clear because the smell dissipated soon after we rolled down the windows.

 “Oh, shh… Who am I kidding, my husband’s vocabulary can be quite colorful. Actually, his reaction was more like “oooohh sh-t!”.  So… after making his colorful commentary upon seeing the time, we both said, “…it’s probably outside” and headed towards the freeway entrance, hoping the smell was behind us.

Nope. Not. At. All. The smell went from the lingering stench a skunk emits when startled or scared to a porter potty before a race. We were thinking up all the possibilities except the one inside our car. One of the ideas we imagined was a dead lizard. Yes! A dead lizard. I take credit for this one because it was a plausible thought. After all, there are many lizards in our neighborhood and there have been times when one has jammed inside our house or car. So, I thought, maybe, I had left a window open, a lizard jumped in, somehow breathed its last breaths in my car and had called it quits in there. Don’t laugh. It was a possibility. Unless, you’re laughing because you are thinking the obvious reason for the smell, then go right ahead because you have every right to be laughing. 

 

A few minutes in, like less than 2, and we were feeling more than nauseous, so, we finally did what we should have done as soon as we smelled that horrid smell-we checked our shoes. Nope, not me. Phew. Not my husband. Phew, again. Our son? Y-eeep. The smell was behind us, alright!

To be continued... in Part 2

***I’m pretty new to blogging, so, I might have a few “2 part” posts, but as soon as I get the hang of blogging, I promise to make them shorter. Well, I’m not sure I want to promise that in case there are some posts that need Rocky, Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Back to the Future, Bridget Jones, Toy Story, Men in Black, Spy Kids, Shrek, Tinker Bell, super hero movies sequels. Ha! I know. You get it. I’ll stop. Until next time. Same bat time, same bat channel. Haha 

"Yes Day!" Part 3 of 3

"Yes Day!" Part 3

Like Teaching, Parenting Requires Reflection and Making Quick Changes When Needed

So, I quickly reflected, paused and told him that, yes, it was “Yes Day!", but, safety is the most important part of everything. “Safety first!” is what I always said to him. After explaining the reasoning for having to say no on "Yes Day!”,  he repeated, “I know, I know, safety first, safety first" while pointing his little index finger to show the #1. Hence, we added a rule to “Yes Day!”. We will say “yes” if the request won’t hurt him or anyone else in the process. In doing this, we are teaching him the tools for self-control, self-love, self-respect, empathy, other-love, and other-respect. Qualities necessary as he progresses in his development, primarily, as he approaches the adolescent years.

What is the point, then?

He gains a sense of control while learning to make intelligent choices. The first "Yes Day!" was a great idea in theory; however, like many ideas in life, theory sounds ideal, but, human nature is not perfect, so we constantly need to implement and use theory as a foundation. Theory is the cone and the flavor of ice cream depends on each individual and their current life situation, so, we chose our flavor based on our life, then. Since then, our flavor is continually changing, but, the foundation remains the same-"safety first!".

Today, he understands that while he would love to gorge on sweets and “junk” food, eventually, he will feel sick and hurt himself. Each year, he will mature and learn to make choices that allow him to enjoy life while ensuring that his safety and other’s safety is always primary. As he progresses in his development, there will be many instances where I won’t be at his side and his friends will be a greater influence on his choices, so, having this mindset of being able to enjoy himself while ensuring "safety first" will be invaluable to him in his future. 

He is human and I expect that there will be times when he will not make the best choices, but, having a foundation and tools to make safe and healthy choices is like always driving with a properly buckled seat belt. He won’t have control over everything, but, he will be prepared and empowered with knowledge and tools to choose the best path when roads place barriers and detours. 

"Yes Day!" Part 2 of 3

Yes Day!? WWWhaat?

Okay, so, you are probably asking yourself, “what is this yes day all about?” Right? O.K., I will tell you. A few years ago, I began “Yes Day!” because I was tired of saying “NO” too often to things I, too, enjoyed as a young girl (candy, ice cream, chocolate, fries, and even those dreaded golden arches), but, as an educated mother in child development, I knew better than to say yes as often as my son asked for these items. So, I searched for ideas on how to make it work for all of us. Finally, one day, without intending to find an answer, I stumbled upon the book, Yes Day! by Amy Krouse Rosenthal and Tom Lichtenheld. As I browsed books on Amazon to teach whatever important lesson I was trying to teach at the time (in a child friendly manner-of course), I found my answer. I browsed the “look inside feature” and immediately placed the book in my cart. Ding! Ding! Ding! I had an idea! The book gave me a brilliant Idea!!! I was beaming with excitement and called my husband at work to tell him that I had found a solution to our son’s obsession with sweets.

How Did I Execute My Idea?

I was going to read the book to him during his bedtime routine of reading a handful of his selections, followed by “recap” (we share our favorite part of the day). Upon “recap”, I would tell him that the following day was going to be his official, first ever, “Yes Day!”. I know, I know. You are probably thinking, “crazy woman, what are you doing?! What were you thinking?!” You are right. In my excitement, I forgot to think through all the possibilities and outcomes. I was focused on the sweets and excited to finally have a solution to a dilemma that had been plaguing our family since “Selma Cookie” (Grandma Cookie) introduced our son to the gloriousness of candy and ice cream. Yes, he nicknamed her “Selma Cookie”.  Later, “Grandma Cookie”. Today, simply, “Grandma”. 

As an aside, I love Grandma Cookie. So, if you read this post, Grandma Cookie, I mentioned you because like most grandparents home's, your home was filled with fun and part of the fun is sweets. I’m not judging- I completely understand that it’s your job to be the fun home.

Are you thinking, this is going to be a disaster, lady? A George the Menace, Curious George day, right? Yes. You. Are. Absolutely. Right. The first annual “Yes Day!” was filled with many requests that I just couldn’t say yes to because of safety. For example, asking to eat candy all day long (for every meal), jumping off a high wall because he wanted to be like Curious George, throwing rocks into the neighbor’s pool to “listen for the splash”, staying up as long as he wanted (this one we kept, but if you’re a parent or are around children, often, you know that this was only a few minutes to an hour later than his regular bedtime. Their bodies are exhausted, so, naturally, they fall asleep as soon as there is little to no activity) and there were a few more that at the moment I can’t recall. 

Fortunately, aside for sporting equipment and his collection of Disney Cars, he didn’t have much of an interest in toys. Hence, there were no requests for an abundance of toys. What did make me smile is that he asked to visit the bookstore and choose three books. Each time, we visit a bookstore, I always let him choose at least one book.  At 11, I am very happy that he still chooses the bookstore as one of his favorite places. More on books, bookstores, and how I nurtured his love of books in a different post. To be continued...

Welcome to My Blog! "Yes Day!" Part 1

Yes Day!

Welcome to my blog! I am thrilled to be connecting with you through a medium that brings me joy and peace-the written word. The decision to start a blog with my Twitter handle stems from wanting to share a tweet about a tradition I started with my son a few years ago. However, the limited characters allowed on Twitter wouldn’t give me the opportunity to share enough about “Yes Day!". 

So, if you like my blog, you can thank this tradition and if you don’t, you can blame the tradition. I hope to share more of my thoughts and experiences related to my love of learning. As my handle name, @lovetolearnrun, states, I LOVE to LEARN and RUN! If education was affordable, I would be a life-long graduate student, earning degrees in as many fields as I could until I no longer possessed my current analytical and critical thinking skills. Fortunately, learning and running keeps the mind sharp.

My first post is related to parenting, the role I have embraced whole-heartedly and place as my greatest achievement. Of course, it is not always bliss, like all great endeavors, there are ups and downs, but, having both extremes is what makes it a well-worth journey. A journey I, initially, imagined would be long, but, the more I explore and travel through it, the more I want to remain in certain spots and enjoy it with all my senses. 

Sadly, life is not a sci-fi book or movie where I have the ability to pause the moments I want to last longer than the few seconds I am given. While parenting takes us through a plethora of adventures, all experiences give parent and child the opportunity to learn and grow. I’m not certain how often I will be posting because at the moment I am trying to complete the first draft of the first book I want to publish. I have written a few, but, I’m not ready to publish those, yet. Like everything I undertake and embark on, I like to take baby steps and only when ready do I commit. But, I’m well worth the wait because when I commit- I COMMIT!